The illusion of “being yourself.”

I was just watching a TV programme, the name not important, and they had people going into schools, trying to be inspiring, telling people it is okay to be themselves and such. This is the same programme that had people being mean and rude to other people using the excuse “this is just me, I have to be myself.”

I think the whole “being yourself” notion is slightly askew. No, I do not think people should have to hide who they are, ever. I think people deserve free speech, although there is no need for meanness or rudeness. I believe it is every person’s right to express themselves and chase their dreams and not be held back by other people. “Being yourself” is all very well and good, I remember similar things happening to me, teachers trying to be inspiring and whatnot but at no point do I remember anyone telling me it was okay to not know who you were, or who you wanted to be.

I am a grown twenty year old woman and I only just think I have figured it out. And you know what, I reserve the right to be wrong and change my mind. 

It is very hard to try and be yourself when you are unsure of yourself, you second guess yourself and for some people in that audience, they would be worried and upset. When I was that age I felt like a failure because I couldn’t be myself, I couldn’t pinpoint what made me, me. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life, let alone who I wanted to be in this world or what sort of mark I wanted to leave. Some people know from an early age. Some people have personalities so strong it shines through very quickly. This is fine, this is completely okay. But it doesn’t happen for everyone. It is not right or wrong.

So once and for all:

It is okay to not know who you are.

It is okay to not know who you want to be.

It is okay to want to change.

My advice would be to not tell people to be themselves, don’t focus on the self. We have enough self obsessed people in this world, thanks. I think we should encourage people to love the differences we see. Once you start loving the differences, it becomes easier to love yourself in a positive way. And only then, I think, can you really begin to figure out who you are as a person.

Kimberly

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